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Charrise
McCrorey is a certified business coach, and
founder of Emergence Business Coaching, LLC.
She is the mother of two grown children, and
she resides in Elkhart with her husband of 25
years. Her extensive corporate sales and management
background lends a unique perspective to her
coaching practice. Charrise volunteers as a
member of the board of directors of the Literacy
Council of St. Joe County, and belongs tot he
Elkhart Chamber of Commerce.
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As
this issue comes out, you're buying pencils, pens, and book
bags. You're rushing around, checking out every back-to-school
sale on the planet, committed to getting your children everything
they need to be cool in school. You might be arranging for
after-school care, or trusting your 12 year-old to be alone
after school for the first time. You're having debates about
the appropriate clothes; keeping your young daughter modest
and your son from showing his underwear. During the past few
months, you've prepared your children for summer camps, taken
them to pool parties, driven them to every summer sporting
event, and now, your blissful, relaxing summer is coming to
a close. It's back to school time again.
Yes,
I know. It's bittersweet. You didn't have to help them with
their homework over the summer; no rushing around doing science
projects, helping with papers and shuttling them to band practice.
You looked forward to spending more time with the children over
the summer, and you will miss having that time. You enjoyed
seeing your children have fun and not have to work as hard as
when they're in school.
Your
children read books, rode bikes, had sleepovers, stayed up late
and ate pizza for breakfast. They went to concerts and movies.
They argued with their siblings and made new friends. They "went
out" with 3 or 4 different puppy loves. They made forts and
camped in your back yard. In some cases, they grew up.
But
now, summer is over and your family returns to the routine that
school days provide; relief or grief? Well…It's relief, of course!
LET'S
PARTY!
I
know. You feel like you shouldn't feel this way. As it turns
out, you can look forward to your children going back to school
and still be a good parent. Really, you can. What does it matter
if you're not spending every possible waking moment with your
children? And maybe that's a good thing, after all.
Of
course, there are the obvious reasons it's good for children
to be in school. You know, education and learning, and all that.
Children develop more fully by being socially active, and by
being exposed to many different kinds of people. They get this
opportunity at school. Children respond well to routine, and
school provides that too. Though they might not admit it, children
have fun at school. Who doesn't like to have fun? Yeah, right?
(Up-talk, the intimation popularized by our youth these days).
OK,
I'm a coach. Here comes the lesson.
Why
are you feeling guilty that you're glad your children are soon
back in school? Life is much too short for this kind of guilt.
They are as happy as you are about returning to school, certainly.
Your guilt is purely self-imposed.
You
love your children enough to provide them with food, shelter,
and education. As a parent, you teach them important lessons
and expose them to new things. You do plenty of good things.
Enjoy
each phase of your life with your children; whether it's school
days or summer. Learn to embrace what is in front of you now,
rather than what's behind you. Even though life gets hectic,
I promise you'll want these moments back someday.
My
children are grown, and yet when I see a 12 year old girl, my
mind always drifts back to when my daughter was 12. The image
of her at 12 is deeply ingrained in my mind, and I often wish
I could have a day or two with that girl.
We
do the best we can do, yo. Chill, would ya?
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